What It's Like



Parker - March 27,  2012
(She has given her Mommy full permission to blog about this)

Parker's mommy here.. I've been thinking about writing this post for about a month - I imagine if you have never lived with an animal with a terminal diagnosis you might wonder what it must be like. I thought I'd let you take a peek into our world and know what we think and go through. What makes us smile and what can make us cry.

Don't let that adorable photo of Parker fool you. She is totally blind. To look at her you would never know it. Unless of course you wave your hand in front of her face and get zero response. Or you see her slip up, falter and then run into an object. Those are the types of things that can instantly make me cry. I will never get use to that behavior from a cat who was so lithe and stealth on her snowy white paws. To see her falter may be the saddest part of this crummy disease. 98% of the time she navigates fine. We just have to be careful and not move the furniture very much.

I am a planner. I always have been. I know that when Parker's time comes she will not suffer. I have my regular vet office's assurance that they will come to our home if needed, and if that plan fails, I have another in place. I will keep my promise that Parker will never get stressed out by a car ride and a vet visit again. Her journey to the Bridge will begin right here in her home. Along with these plans I asked a dear friend a few months ago to purchase a very special basket and line that basket with soft fabric fit for a princess. She did as I requested and I now have that basket tucked away, out of my sight. It's for Parker...after. It's the basket that she will lay in to make the trip to the funeral home. I have already made arrangements with them and they will accept her when we need them to, night or day. I only speak of this now because I don't speak of it very much in my day-to-day life. It makes me feel a little lighter to share it.  I also imagine that if you have never been through this you might wonder what different people do when faced with the reality that they are going to lose their beloved pet. If you are me, you plan. You also take photos, but you take less than you use to, because you want photos of a healthy Parker to outnumber the photos of an ill Parker. Better to look back at someday down the road. It's funny, but it's hard to look at old pictures now. They tend to make me cry.

Each evening for the last few months,  Parker and I have a little ritual. She has a favorite blanket that she likes to nap on. Her Daddy molds it into a round shape with safe little walls around it. She sits in that blanket next to me each evening and she knows that it's treat time. Be it Temptations, chicken, steak, cheese, whatever - it's our time. She eats out of my palm,licking my hand as she scoops up the treat. It's so very, very precious. It also makes me cry.

Parker's eating also makes us laugh. With everything that she's going through, her appetite has never dwindled. She has never forgotten what it was like to be feral and scrounge for food. To this day she eats as if she'll never be served another bowl of food in her life. Each day, my husband feeds the cats wet cat food as a treat (we split one can of Fancy Feast between the 4 cats). Parker's little internal kitty clock knows when the time is drawing near and she begins to cry and talk to my husband. Standing in the kitchen literally yelling at him to open the can. Blind and sick, she still sounds like a bad-a** cat demanding the good stuff.. Watching that spectacle makes me laugh. It's like listening to the young and vital Parker.

Living with a terminally ill animal means that you wake up each morning wondering and you go to sleep each night wondering. It means that you treat each milestone and holiday differently. It means that you hover a lot. It means that you examine each hiccup, each stretch of a muscle. I'm sure that if Parker could see, she'd be so very annoyed at me - Parker was never a kitty to welcome hovering. I imagine that when I have to travel there's a part of Parker that goes "thank goodness'- now I'll get a little peace..."

So....as it stands we take things day by day. Parker sleeps about 20 hours a day and spends the rest of her time eating and stretching her muscles.. She's in no pain, but she is so very  teeny-tiny. I often wonder what it is she dreams of. She gives the most spectacular yawns now - that makes me laugh. She also has become much more affectionate - she was never what you'd call cuddly - now she loves to be hugged and scritched and petted and smooched. making up for lost time, I guess.

You are never ready and I don't try to fool myself that I've become prepared for the inevitable. I cry at the drop of a dime and I know it's because deep down, I am always thinking what a raw deal this is - for her - and for us, the family that loves her dearly.

Both Parker and I say thank-you for all of the support you have shown to us. We don't know how much longer we have together, but we make the most of what we have.

Big smoochies from her, big thanks from me.

xoxoxoxox



'Twas The Night Before Christmas...

It's Christmas Eve day and I am taking a nap and waiting for tonight when we get to hear The Night Before Christmas. Mommy has had this book since she was a kitten. It is one of her most treasured possessions (aside from me!). We here at Casa de Parker wish you a happy and cozy Christmas Eve.
Smoochies!

Parker Update

Hi everykitty and 'rent - I wanted to stop in and say hello. I'm taking lots of naps and eating lots of leftover turkey. I found a sunspot too - it felt good.
We had company over for Thanksgiving and I was able to visit with them. I still feel pretty OK, but I am very tired. The 'rents don't hover over me too much, but they sure do stick close. That's OK 'cause I'm always up for a cuddle or two anymore. No pain, good appetite and very tired. That about sums it up.
I hope your Thansgiving was full of turkey and love.
Smoochies!

Easy Like Sunday

Such a pretty Autumn day! I know that I convince Mommy to let us out on the deck, the weather would be perfect for a few hours of sunning my furs. Daddy has to rake leaves and I think for once, Mommy has a little free time to just sit and be with us kitties.
Mommy has been crazy busy these last few months and we deserve a little playtime!
I mean, who could say no to this face???

Saturday Caturday - Puff

Hi! Puff here to give you a Mommy update. We are all very grateful for all of the purrs and prayers for Mommy. Thanks from the bottom of our little kitty hearts! Those purrs and prayers are very powerful because Mommy is home and the doctor thinks that things look very promising! They won't know for certain for a few days but we are hopeful that the doctor is right! We have been busy with nursing duties around the clock. It's a good thing that there are four of us, we take shifts and that ensures that Mommy is never without one of us to keep her calm and relaxed while she recovers. Diamond has been a great nurse-woofie and will not leave her side. And Daddy? Well they don't make better beans than our Daddy, Mommy says that he is the best husband that a gal could ask for!
Things are getting back to normal here in O Hi O and we are glad for normal!
Have a wonderful Saturday!

I Am Asking For A Huge Big Favor

Hi there everybuddy...

Back in February of this year Mommy had a health scare. Today she has to go back in to the hospital for another look around her insides. I have a big, huge favor to ask of you kittes and my NOMS pals. Could you send a little purr or prayer to us in O Hi O? We know the power of positive thoughts and prayers and we sure could use them now.

I may not be able to visit for a little while but I will keep you updated when I can.

Thanks in advance kitties...Smooches!

Tattle Tail Tuesday

So, you know what kitties? Staycations are the bomb. I had Mommy home with me for 5 days! You would think that we would have a lot of photos showing what we did. But really what happened was a whole lot of snuggle time, a whole lot of play time, a whole lot of making "love eyes" at each other time, a whole lot of treats and hide and seek and grooming and...well...you get the idea. The camera, the phone, the lists of things to do - there weren't any of that. Just relaxing and enjoying some time with each other.
Sometimes we just need to do that with the 'rents. It does their hearts (and ours) good.
Smoochies!

Easy Like Sunday ?

Happy Mother's Day to all you groovy Moms!

Things are very busy here at Parker's little corner of the earth. While she's busy pouting I'll tell you what's going on...
The rent's are getting ready to leave us on Thursday for 5 whole days! They are going to a place called Lake Tahoe. I don't know where it is, but they have to fly to get there. They are celebrating their 11th anniversary. And they are going to take a ride in a helicopter!
Rudy-Toots celebrates his 10th birthday on Wednesday! He gets to have a special post that day. Parker is none too happy about that! Puff and me have our 11th Gotcha' Day a week from today and the 'rents won't even be here! That's just wrong!
Our sitter is coming Wednesday night. She's very nice and gives us treats. Diamond and Rudy are in love with her. I don't let her see me very much when she's here. Maybe this time I will. I just don't know...
Well, I need to go and make sure Parker hasn't tried to stow away in Daddy's suitcase for the squillionth time.
Have a groovy Sunday/Mom's Day!
Love,
Powder

Easy Like Sunday For Some of Us

Parker: It's Sunday, it's supposed to be easy!

Powder: Then why is Mommy going to work today?
Parker: 'Cause beans aren't as smart as us.
Powder: This is true...

Formerly Feral Friday - Putting My Paw Down

Today was the day that I was going to show you my face and how my BooBoo is improving, but Mommy came home from traveling with a wicked bad cold. I have to put my paw down and insist that she rest a bit.
We will be back as soon as she feels a little better. In the meantime, I have to go and purr on her chest. Nurse Parker to the rescue! Formerly Ferals know the importance of resting up and staying warm when you are sick!
Vicks Vapor-Rub Smoochies to all of you!

Formerly Feral Friday - Fantastic, Fabulous, Cancer-Free!

It may be the poorest home-made Valentine you've ever looked at, but I don't care. 'Cause for this home in O Hi O, we received the best news ever last night. My Mommy is Benign!

It's the best news a kitty could get!

Tripper, I want you to be my valentine, Mommy, I'm so glad you are OK!

Life is pretty darn good!

Smooches!

Thankful Thursday - Mommy Edition

Tuesday was a very stressful day for all of us. Mommy was in the hospital and Daddy was there with her the whole time. We were not allowed to go with them so we waited at home.

We watched out the window.
We watched by the table

We waited by the stairs.

We worried by the door.

Some of us waited by keeping the chair warm.

But late Tuesday night, they came home! Mommy was very tired and a little ouchy, but she is doing OK and the doctor thinks they got out what they needed to get out - all of it! They will not be sure for another 7-10 days, but the doctor sounded very positive and hopeful. Mommy feels so much better that she is going back to work today. Mommy and I want to say thank-you for all of the positive purrs and prayers. We know that they helped! I have been very busy being chief snuggle kitty - I really didn't leave Mommy's side for the whole time she was recovering. I think that today I am going to take some "me" time and play with my 'nip nanner. Maybe tonight I'll get some treats and play time with Mommy!

Tattle Tail Tuesday - My BooBoo v.2

Take a gander, but it ain't pretty.

It's fine, not infected, just unattractive!
Rudy is soooooo in for it!

(Hey kitties, it isn't only me that's having a rough health patch, Mommy is having surgery today to see if she has something wrong with her insides. Chances are very good that they will not find anything bad, but I know her and Daddy are a little anxious. I'd like to ask that you purr and pray that there is not a single thing wrong with her and that she is back home tonight. I don't think I will be able to post for a few days, she's gonna' have to focus on getting over the surgery. I'm gonna miss you guys, but I promise, I will be back as soon as I can - smoochies to all of you, now I have to go and hang with Mommy, she's needing serious kitty mojo!)

Tattle Tail Tuesday

Diamond: "Oh, Hi there, I'm here to kick off Tattle Tail Tuesday..."
"Mommy had a birthday last Wednesday. Many of you participated in her Commentathon. It was very successful and we raised some green papers to help with sweet Sprout's final expenses. Mommy said that was the bestest gift of all..."
" But...all of us got together and decorated the house and gave her some flowers and made her a yummy dinner (complete with a glass of wine!) It was waiting for her when she came home from hunting that day. Parker posed as a centerpiece."
" We even made her a card. Her eyes got leaky, but we think she liked it!
Speaking of Birthdays', Parker's birthday is tomorrow. She's going to be 7 years old! But I wasn't supposed to tell anyone. That's too bad though, it's Tattle Tail Tuesday and I'm Diamond the Tattle-Tail!"

Commentathon!

Today is the day I celebrate my Mommy. Her birthday is today - she's passed her half a century mark and is grateful for each day. I am grateful for her and for her passion for helping animals and beans. I wanted to get her a big present, but she said she would rather do something else. She says that she has everything she needs; Daddy, us kitties and Diamond Doggie. We have a nice place to live, enough food to eat and we have love. Really, when you think about it, she's right. We have everything a family could want.
So, in the face of the tragedy that has happened to Monty Q's family, Mommy wants to have a Commentathon. For every comment that is left today, we're gonna' donate 25 cents toward Sprout's final medical expenses.
There are not a lot of rules - you need to have a blog or be a member of Catster or Dogster to comment. If you are a multi-cat/dog/goat/hamster/gerbil/whatever you are - each creature's comment will count (even beans!). Here's what we would like you to comment on -
"In the next 12 months, I promise to make the world a kinder/nicer/better place by ________."

(This is Mommy with a KC Shelter kitty)

Happy Birthday Mommy!

All my smooches go to you today!

Our Mother's Day Gift

Last October we were told by the nice people at Mutts that Diamond's adoption story would be included in the book Shelter Stories. We pooled our Temptations together and got a copy of the book for Mommy. She said it was the best Mother's Day gift ever!

She got leaky eyes when she saw this.
This is his page! And Puff got to be in the book!

Happy Mother's Day to all of you fantastic Moms out there!

Formerly Feral Friday - I'm Getting Picky!

Last Sunday Mommy thought she would make a special treat for all of us kitties. She took the recipe from Hot(M)BC for HAM! Cookies. She even went out in the blizzard to buy the ingredients 'cause we don't have baby food, wheat germ and powdered milk just hanging out in the pantry. She really is a good Mommy!
Here's the most important part - HAM!
She mixed everything up and rolled the mixture into little balls. (She says that wearing disposable gloves is a very good idea!) Then she popped them into the oven and baked them 'till they were all brown and pretty.
Here's the finished product. She let them cool and then she called all of us into the kitchen. Then she gave each of us our very own cookie. You know what we did then? We sniffed them. Then we looked at Mommy. Then we all left. Then Mommy called us back and broke the cookies up into smaller pieces to see if we would eat them. Nope. Not interested. Mommy wondered if I was sick or something 'cause I love HAM! more than anything else in the world. She finally gave up and left the kitchen. Later she caught Powder snarfing the cookies down. So, 1 kitty out of 4 ain't bad! She did, however, discover that Diamond Doggy LOVES them! I think it's going to be a very long time before Mommy makes us any treats again, she'll stick to getting our treats from the store! So, here's what I know - even formerly feral kitties can get picky, but we never forget how lucky we are to have a great home and a Mommy who loves us very much. Happy Friday everykitty!

I've Been Tagged! For The Very Third Time!

The wonderful kitties, Skeeter and LC tagged me for a new Meme!

It's a very good Meme and here it is -

Think of 5 positive things to say about your Bein or other companion. Not about us, but about the others around you.

Pretty good idea, eh? I am going to choose my Mommy since she is taking care of us all by herself while Daddy is in the Sunshine State.

> She dances with me sometimes! I really like it 'cause when we are dancing she will sing to me too and then give me smoochies! I like that mushy stuff...sometimes.

>She taught me how to "High Five" for a treat. This trick has reaped many, many treats!

>She helps me with this blog. Since I don't have thumbs and my claws could get stuck in the keys, she types for me.

>She likes tuna. Since she likes tuna, I get to have tuna juice. And tuna. TUNA! I love tuna!

>Nobody cleans up yak and hairballs better than Mommy! This is a good skill!

I am going to tag three kitties - Lily, Millie and Luxor!

Wordless Wednesday - Don't Forget I Live Here Too! Featuring Powder

Tagged! Seven Strange Things About My Mommy. (Cripe, Only 7?)

First, the Front and Back of Mommy's Favorite T-Shirt

Megan over at Bad Kitty Cats tagged Mommy to list seven strange things about herself. I live with Mommy and I can tell you that there many strange things about her - this will be easy. Mommy is going to let me tell you about seven of them.
Here I go!
She's the world's guiltiest carnivore - Mommy was a vegetarian for many years. She always said she would never eat anything with a face. Three years ago she was diagnosed with Diabetes and had to cut way down on the amount of carbohydrates that she eats. Now she eats meat, but always feels bad about it.
She loves cloudy days - Now being a cat, I have never met a sunbeam I didn't like. (Hi Anastasia!) But Mommy loves a cloudy day with a cool breeze. Maybe it's because she has very fair skin and no fur to protect her, but she avoids being out in the sun. I find this very, very strange.
She was severely allergic to cats and rabbits as a child - Pretty awful for a kid who loved kitties! She would swell up and couldn't breath. Mommy thinks she developed an immunity by slowly exposing herself to cats over the years. By the time she was 19 she could handle being around one cat, eventually more. (Thank goodness!)
She knows all the words to just about every Motown song - Growing up in Detroit in the early/mid sixties had a lot to do with that.
She parallel parks better than 99% of the people in the world - Mommy said her Daddy taught her how to park and he was an engineer on the big freighters on the Great Lakes. I guess engineers can be pretty precise and park good...
For her last job she drove over 900 miles every week - She had to visit a lot of hospitals for her job, many of them were in remote places that did not have airports. She had to drive. A lot. Every week. She didn't enjoy that very much and had to be away from home. Today, she could walk to work if she wanted to!
She hates to talk on the phone for more than a minute at a time - Mommy said to say this - "if you had to be on call for years and years, you would hate to talk on the phone too!"
So there you have it (only) seven strange things about my Mommy. Strange or not, she's my Mommy and I love her more than tuna juice! That was fun Megan! Thanks!
*p.s. Purrs to Oscar's family - you are in my prayers